The loading bar. Christ. You sit there watching it crawl like you're downloading a whole operating system, not some browser game about monster girls in towers. I actually opened Twitter while waiting, scrolled past some drama, forgot why I opened my laptop, then remembered. Still loading. When it finally pops, you get this deliberately rough RPG Maker thing where the art looks like someone drew it on a napkin during lunch break. Not in a bad way necessarily, but you can tell polish wasn't the goal here.

You're some dark lord's errand boy basically, climbing towers filled with monster girls who want to, uh, drain you in multiple ways. The combat is turn based and honestly kind of broken. Some enemies will wreck you in two hits while others just stand there letting you chip away at their health for five minutes. There's this one slime girl on floor three of the first tower who kept using this binding attack and I couldn't move for like eight turns straight. Just sat there watching my HP drop while she did her thing. Weirdly hot? I don't know. The scenes trigger on loss mostly, which means you're incentivized to fail, and the animations are these choppy little loops that somehow work better than they should. Something about the jankiness adds to it.

Exploration is just clicking around identical looking floors until you find the stairs or a monster closet. No map, no quest log that makes sense. I wandered past the same broken pillar asset four times before realizing I was going in circles. The translation is also completely unhinged, dialogue that reads like someone put it through Google Translate twice then added their own flair. "Your essence will become mine, foolish tower climber" type energy. You know what though, the game knows what it is. A messy, horny little time waster with surprising amount of content if you can stomach the rough edges. Which are many. Very many. That one boss on the fifth tower with the tentacle hair, the hitbox on her grab attack is genuinely unfair and I'm still mad about it.