I swear half the fun is just seeing what the fuck happens next. Exiles throws you into this dusty Arabian Nights city as a street rat, and before you know it you're in some rich bastard's service, and then... vikings? Pirates? A muscle girl who could snap you in half giving you a footjob while some femboy watches from the corner? The plot is absolutely unhinged and it knows it. The writing has this wink wink nudge nudge energy that doesn't take itself seriously at all, which is refreshing when most fantasy porn games act like they're writing the next Game of Thrones.

The 3DCG is rough. Like, deliberately unpolished rough. Some renders look like they were lit with a single desk lamp, and the animations can be janky as hell. But weirdly it adds to the charm? There's this one scene early on with a middle eastern merchant woman where the clipping is so bad her hand goes straight through the protagonist's thigh during a handjob, and I laughed so hard I had to pause. Not exactly the intended reaction, but memorable nonetheless. The character models are all over the place too. One minute you're with a realistic looking pirate queen, the next a cartoonishly proportioned viking with abs you could grate cheese on. The femboy character, who shows up later, has this dead eyed stare that haunts me.

The optional gay and trans content is handled with a toggle, which is nice. No surprises if that's not your thing. The group scenes get genuinely creative though. There's this one moment in a longship where things escalate from a simple vaginal scene to this whole tangled mess of limbs and oral and anal that had me genuinely impressed by the logistics. The foot fetish stuff is very present, almost aggressively so. Like the dev has a thing. A specific thing. And honestly? Good for them. The graphic violence tag isn't joking either. Some deaths are comically over the top, blood spraying everywhere mid sex scene, which is a tonal whiplash I didn't know I needed. The adventure part is actually decent, with choices that matter, though I wish the inventory system wasn't such a clunky mess. You'll spend way too long clicking through menus when you could be clicking through... other things. The medieval fantasy setting jumps continents and maybe planets? I lost track. Something about the fate of the world. Whatever, I'm here for the chaos.