The loading screen is a pair of legs in shiny black high heels, crossed at the ankle, and I'm already impatient. My train's delayed again, some signal failure at Clapham Junction, so this is my five minutes. The whole premise is ridiculous, some medical condition where the guy makes too much... stuff, but can't get it up normally. So the doctor and nurse, right, they're "treating" him. That treatment involves the nurse's tits basically in his face while the doctor watches, and the dialogue is so flat it's almost art. But the animation, when you finally get to it, has this weirdly specific weight to the bodies. The 3D models aren't polished, skin looks like wax sometimes, but the way the nurse's hand moves during the handjob scene... it's got this deliberate, almost bored rhythm that's more effective than it should be.

Then you go home and there's the housemate, this older woman who's clearly the "most important person" and the game keeps winking about the "forbidden line" which, come on, we all know where that's going. There's a whole sleep-sex thing you can try, creeping into her room, the groping mechanics are just clicking and dragging but my screen's smudged and I'm paranoid the guy next to me can see the reflection. You can choose a domination path or a love path, which is funny because the domination stuff is so over the top, it's like a teenager wrote it. Which, I guess, is the point. The voyeurism angle with the nurse hiding behind a screen, watching you with the doctor, that got me. Don't know why. The sound is just these wet slapping noises on a loop, no voice acting, and sometimes it desyncs so it's just... slaps in silence.

Spent way too long on the character creator, trying to get the milf's chest to look less like two bowling balls, but the sliders are all weird. You can't really fix it. The whole harem thing builds up, you get the teen, the doctor, the housemate, and the guide who teaches you how to be a creep basically. There's a scene where you lose your virginity and the game makes a huge deal about the creampie, like a slow motion shot that lasts forever. My stop is next. I didn't even get to the oral scene I was building up to. The game crashed once when I tried to load the domination route too fast. Typical.