So the calendar says it's "National Superhero Day" or something, right? And I'm digging through these parody games because what else are you gonna do, watch another Marvel movie? Found this Teen Titans thing. Not the good cartoon network one with the cool art style, the other one. The one where everyone's kinda... off. But Raven's there. And that's the whole point, isn't it?

You're the new Titan. Just... there. No origin story, no powers explained, nothing. And immediately Raven, miss "I don't do feelings" herself, drags you to her room. The game doesn't even pretend there's a plot. It's a Renpy slideshow, you know the type. Click, click, click, and suddenly her cloak's on the floor. The animations are... they tried. They really tried. The tits are massive, like someone inflated beach balls under her leotard, and the "animated" scenes are just two frames wobbling back and forth. It's so unpolished it loops around to being hypnotic. You stare at the jittery cock going in and out during the creampie scene and think, "someone drew this with a mouse in 2008 and uploaded it to Newgrounds." And they probably did.

Wish the kiss scene had any sound. Dead silence except for my keyboard clicking. A little "smooch" would've killed them? But no. Just Raven's dead fish eyes staring at you while text says she's "moaning your name." The blowjob part is like watching a robot eat a banana. Very mechanical. Very "I learned anatomy from a hentai screenshot." But here's the thing. I kept clicking. The cum animation is just a white splatter PNG they drag across the screen. I laughed. Then clicked again. Dare to play it alone, or invite company? Nah, this is a solo mission. Your friends don't need to see your "Teen Titans goon session" folder.