The green spots. Always the green spots. My savefile archive for this one is just a mess of half finished levels because I got distracted by the gallery, which is the whole point, right? It's called "collect" and "hentai" and "big tits" and honestly that's the entire contract. You click to move, you touch the green dots, and a picture unlocks. The art is that specific kind of anime where the boobs have their own gravitational pull, defying physics and probably causing back problems in any real universe. I spent a good chunk of time on level 4 just failing on purpose because the unlocked image from level 3 was... let's say it was a very detailed study of anatomy.

The gameplay is almost aggressively basic. You're a dot or a thing, moving around a flat plane, and the hitboxes on the green spots feel a bit drunk sometimes. I swear I passed right through one on level 7 and had to do a weird little wiggle to trigger it. The game doesn't care. It's not trying to be a platformer. It's a delivery system for a spank bank, and on that front, it delivers. The gallery fills up with these high saturation images, all huge eyes and even huger... plots. One picture had a character in a position that made me wonder about spine flexibility for a solid minute before I remembered I was supposed to be collecting more spots.

Then there's the sound. Or lack of it. Dead silence. I ended up opening my own music app, some lo-fi thing, which made the whole experience feel even more surreal. A meditative wank session, guided by green dots. The game never gets harder, not really. The spots just move to slightly more annoying places. I kept thinking about how weird it is that we've gamified this. Like, my ancestors hunted mammoths and I'm here, clicking on green circles to see cartoon boobs. No regrets. The savefile for level 12 is corrupted or I just forgot to finish it. Can't remember. Doesn't matter. The gallery was already full by then.