Right so the whole thing is a fever dream where you collect anime girls like pokemon but with more jiggle physics. Hentai Heroes doesn't even pretend to be balanced, you start as some loser who can't get laid and five minutes later you're running a harem empire with stats that make no sense. The combat is just clicking through vaguely RPG looking menus while the girls lose more clothing, which is honestly the entire point.

I spent way too long optimizing my battle team based on... actually I have no idea what the stats do. There's numbers everywhere and sometimes you win. The parody characters are wild, like they didn't even try to hide who they're copying, just slapped a different hair color on and called it a day. The dialogue reads like someone fed a thousand hentai scripts into a blender and hit puree. One minute you're having a serious conversation about saving the world or whatever, next minute someone's shirt evaporates because you picked the right dialogue option. The art style bounces between actually decent and "did a teenager draw this in study hall" but honestly that's part of the charm.

The gacha mechanics are predatory as hell but also I kept clicking. You get these affection items that look like random junk, a rose, a chocolate, a literal diamond, and you just spam them at girls until they love you enough to show you their boobs. It's stupid. I love it. The writing has these moments of genuine humor buried under mountains of bad puns and sex jokes that don't land. There's this one scene with a ninja girl where the translation completely breaks and she starts speaking in what I think is supposed to be old English but comes out as Shakespeare having a stroke. I screenshotted it. The energy system is annoying, you run out of stamina right when things get interesting and then you're just staring at timers. But the parody stuff keeps pulling me back, seeing bootleg versions of famous anime characters in increasingly ridiculous situations hits some dumb part of my brain just right.