I dunno why I keep coming back to this candy factory game. The loading screen is ugly as sin, like someone drew it with their left hand while distracted. But then you're in this weird nature trail and these two factory guys run into some girls from work and one of them has tits the size of actual watermelons. Not exaggerating. The physics on those things are absolutely broken, they jiggle for like ten seconds after any movement, which is honestly the best part of the whole experience.

The dialog is complete nonsense. Something about experimental lemon candy that makes you horny? The translation feels like it went through three different languages and then got chewed up by a dog. At one point a character says "your rod is making my candy factory produce extra" and I had to put my phone down because what does that even mean. The art style switches quality between scenes too, one moment it's almost decent hentai and the next it looks like a middle school doodle someone colored in with markers.

But here's the thing. I kept clicking. The minigame where you mix the candy ingredients is stupid simple but somehow I messed it up three times and got a bad ending where everyone just walks away disappointed. The good ending though. Holy shit. The blonde one with the absurd chest does this thing with a lollipop that I won't describe here but let's say the sound effects are way too wet and it loops awkwardly. I laughed so hard I nearly choked. Then I played it again. I still don't know what the lemon flavor has to do with anything but I think I've unlocked all the scenes now and I'm not proud but I'm also not deleting my browser history. The candy shop setting is barely there, it's mostly just that one trail and some bushes that look like green scribbles. Why is there a bush that shakes? Nobody explains the bush.