The clicking sound my mouse makes when i spin the wheel to change angles is probably the most intimate thing about this whole thing. That and the way her expression doesn't change. You got this girl, she's supposed to be a teen or whatever, the body says yes, the face says no. Not in a "she's saying no" way, in a "the artist drew one (1) emotion" way. And I'm here zooming in on this permanently placid face while choosing which hole gets what, like i'm ordering from a very awkward menu. And honestly? That's kind of the vibe. The coldness of it actually feeds into the obsessive thing. She's not resisting. She's not into it either. She's just... there. A perfect little doll.

So the big selling point is you get to pick where you finish. Facial, inside, the usual palette. And the game gives you this little window after every sequence, like a waiter asking if you'd like dessert. I found myself always picking facial. Every single time. Just to see that same blank look get some kind of marking. Some proof that something happened. The paizuri animation is hilarious though, it looks like a technical glitch in a factory, two round objects moving and this third thing just kind of clipping through. I spent way too long watching that. It's not sexy, it's like a lava lamp for degenerates.

There's this title you're supposed to win, "Sex Friend." Which is the funniest possible name for a certificate you get after mechanically selecting a creampie from a dropdown menu of life choices. The whole thing runs in a browser tab like a forgotten flash game from an era where nobody knew how joints worked. The doggystyle angle is actually the most functional, probably because it's mostly just a back and a physics simulation that's trying its best. She never makes a sound, the loop just goes on, and I'm there, a certified Sex Friend, staring at her expressionless face, trying to find a shred of something to latch onto. Found it after the fifth load on her cheek. Right there, in the static. She's not bored, she's just waiting. For me to decide. Always waiting.